I am pissed. I’m pissed that this happened. Im pissed that so many people are plagued with fertility problems, but that it is so so expensive to get around. I’m pissed that in a country and planet with so many children needing a safe home, it is such an incredibly difficult, long and sometimes costly process to adopt. I’m pissed that infertility is not at all covered by insurance. I even looked at buying my own insurance, nope. None of the plans you can buy cover it either.I’m depressed and overwhelmed by the uphill battle that lies ahead, no matter what path we decide to take. I know I can do it, and I know that I will do it, but I’m pissed that I have to. I will get through it. I don’t need answers, I just need to vent a bit 🙂 Ok, enough bitching for now.
In other news, we went to the pumpkin patch and Wyatt literally LICKED the pig pen. Is there anything more filthy than the actual thing people use as a phrase to describe something filthy? What the hell? One moment his pacifier is in his mouth (a great deterrent to him licking and sticking things in his mouth), but apparently he had an overwhelming need to lick it, so he spit his bink out into the pig pen and then licked the pen itself.
“Oh hi Cold and Flu Season! Come on in! Here, let me roll out a red carpet and get you some slippers and a monogrammed robe. I have put your stuff in our guest room since you will likely be staying for a few months.”
Butters has this tricycle that has a handle so we can steer and push. He LOVES it. He wants to ride it all the time. Seriously, ALL the time. He climbs on, hands on the handlebars, ringing his little bike bell and waving to anyone and everyone. It is pretty damn adorable, I must say. He needs a leather biker vest. Then he sees the older neighborhood boys on their bikes and points and yells at them in something that sounds like Mandarin. He’s such a badass.
He’s not a big brother anymore, but this has made me kiss him more and hug him harder. We are going to try again, but for now it’s just us three. I am trying to soak it all in and enjoy the pig-pen-licking child we have.